So now, friends, I have a quandary: do the dream London marathon or stick with Edinburgh? In listing the pro’s and con’s of each race the only pro of London is the fact that it is London. With Edinburgh I don’t have to start the training programme until 1 February and I don’t have to raise any money. It sounds horribly selfish but we all know that raising money is not easy and certainly raising £1,450 would be difficult; especially in this (dreaded phrase) ‘economic climate’ and with my upcoming work commitments in the run-up to the May election.

Having gotten over the initial elation of knowing I could run London I have now started to think more logically; hence identifying the only real pro of running London being the fact that it is where it is. More pro’s for the Edinburgh marathon are creeping in as well: good breaking-in race as there may be less runners than London and the first five miles are downhill; and of course I can always try to do London next year. I’ve also been toying with the idea of doing the New York marathon in November. Basically, London is not the be-all end-all marathon.

I’m pretty much 80% sure that I’ll stick with Edinburgh, but I thought I would put this out there for any comments from my friends and family.

When I got the news last week I immediately sprang into action and started applying and contacting a handful of charities that still have what are known as Gold Bond places available. I would be able to run in the marathon but I would have to raise money for the charity, anywhere from £1,450 to £2,000. A lot of people run the marathon this way. Many people do it because they want to raise money for the charity. I’m sure many others do it for the same reason as mine: didn’t get in through ballot but really want to run.

We think highly of charities but, at the end of the day, they are a business. To them, the most important thing is money. You become just a figure; how much can you raise? They will judge my applications based partly on why I want to run and on how much I can pledge to raise for them. I have been touched by breast cancer to an extent but it was not my best friend, it was my mother’s. I can say my father has asthma but it hasn’t caused him a lot of problems. My mother has arthritis but many people do. I don’t have enough of a sob story to stand out and I have put the minimum amount on each application as I believe I may struggle to find enough sponsors or ideas to raise money. I only raised £250.00 when I ran a 5k in the summer. I realise £250.00 is better than none but in this case if I don’t raise the minimum amount the charity might well give my place to another person, potentially after I have put in hours of training for the race and dashing my hopes of running the marathon.

Just yesterday I received an email from a charity I applied to after a colleague mentioned they were advertising for runners. I received a polite reply that since I could not pledge to raise £3,000 for them nor was I directly affected by Epidermolysis Bullosa I should try my luck elsewhere. Thanks for the application but no thanks. I was just slightly appalled and even more slightly worried that this was the first of many ‘rejections’. It’s like applying for a job all over again.

I’ll find out in a few weeks how I fare with the other charities. I can only hope that I am accepted by one and that this one is, perhaps (and as awful as it may sound), on the lower end of the fundraising scale. I think I can manage £1,500 if I really nag all of my friends and possibly even try to guilt-trip the Councillors with whom I work. It’s not something I will relish but if it allows me to run the marathon, by God, I’ll do it. Please keep your fingers and toes crossed for me and, if you’re of the persuasion, say a couple of prayers also that one of these charities will take me. Then, if I get lucky, please, please open up your pocketbook or wallet and donate to one of these worthy causes.

Virtually every woman knows another woman who has had breast cancer. My mom’s friend Debbie McLelland was one of the millions. She survived the first attack. She lost a breast to the cancer but she survived. Then a few years later it came back…with a vengeance. Not only did it attack the other breast but it moved to the liver and finally the brain at the very end. Debbie was so strong and full of life. She was a lot of fun to be around. She was irreverent, unapologetic for who she was and she was my mom’s best friend for many years. She was a single mother and left behind a son named Josh.

Every year Debbie would take part in the Susan G. Komen 5K in Fayetteville, Arkansas. She would walk the course rather than run it but year after year from the first bout of cancer she was there. When it had invaded her liver and she knew she only had a few months, she was still there. That was the first time I thought of doing one of these. I thought maybe she wouldn’t be up for walking that year and offered to do it in her place, in her honour. She politely declined because she was going to do it herself. She was a determined lady. Unfortunately that determination finally ran out in November 2004.

Ever since then I’ve thought of doing one of these cancer run/walks but until the last year I wasn’t physically fit enough. Now I can run five miles without much of forethought. Five kilometres is relatively easy these days. I’ve lost more than 30 pounds and am continuing to run and lose. This race is for both Debbie and me. I’m running this particular race for Debbie and for all of the other breast cancer sufferers and survivors in the UK and the world. But I’m also doing this, just a bit, for me. I’ve already run a timed 5K last autumn but this will be my first official race. I’ve got the bib number to prove it. I’m looking so forward to it. It’s going to be an emotional and physical day.

I really hope you’ll donate to my fundraising. If you’ve visited the link (to the right and above titled race for life donations) and seen that I’ve already hit my fundraising goal, please re-visit and consider donating. I set a very low fundraising limit so as not to overwhelm myself. I’d never done this before so I wasn’t sure how much I could get. Please, please even just $5.00 or £5.00 is a great help. My friends in other countries can also donate. This probably won’t be the last you hear from me. If I get into the marathon it’ll likely be in a charity place so don’t give all you’ve got right now! Save some for later! On 28 June, please think of me, running in Richmond Park for Debbie and all of the other breast cancer sufferers, victims and survivors in the world. Thank you.

Even if I don’t make it in with the ballot I can still run for a charity as they have guaranteed places. I’ll be applying to several over the coming months and look at some of the smaller ones come October should I not get in.

I’ll then start training November/December time. You need 16 weeks to properly train for a marathon. Anything less than that and you risk injury. I’m already doing well on long-ish runs. I did an easy four miles on Sunday. My 5K (3.1 miles) in the summer for Cancer Research UK should be a relative breeze. Next I’ll try and knock out a 10K and then possibly the Cardiff half-marathon in October. Let me tell you, once you start running, it can become addictive. Wish me luck!

According to my fantastic Garmin GPS heart rate monitor software my highest point was 150 feet (I’m guessing above sea level) and the steepest gradient was 8%. I’m not entirely sure how gradient works, but trust me; it kicked my butt in both the figurative and literal sense. I’m quite proud of myself and thought I’d share this with you. It also gives me the chance to push my Race for Life 5K again. See top of the page to donate.

The first time I noticed a major difference in my waistline was August when several pairs of trousers were falling off of me. I’ve gone down one whole size in most shops and in Marks and Spencer I can now fit into clothing two sizes smaller. I feel a lot better and am enjoying running more and more, hence the 5K Race for Life I’m undertaking (hint, hint; see top of page to donate).

I’ve now encountered a small problem: I think my feet and hands are shrinking along with the rest of me. This week I’ve worn a pair of shoes that I bought last year and were always comfortably spacious. In other words they didn’t pinch or squeeze but they weren’t falling off my feet either. This week, however, they were very loose and falling off my feet. Now it seems the same is happening to my hands and wrists. My wedding rings are close to being loose enough to fall off with a too swift hand motion and my watch has become very loose in its original notch but if I take it down one it is slightly too snug. While all of this is good news on the whole, it is slightly annoying and frustrating on a daily basis. Apparently I’m not alone. A colleague who also lost a great deal of weight told me his feet went down a whole shoe size. He said it freaked him out, which I can understand. Currently, I’m just more annoyed than freaked.

I go into one shop and fit into a size smaller than previous. I go into another and that size is slightly too big but two sizes is slightly small. I have recently purchased a skirt suit two sizes smaller because it fit well enough and I’m only going to get smaller. Again, all of this is fantastic as a big picture but as it gets warmer I will find less and less in my wardrobe that fits and, therefore, lead to another ‘problem’ of this regime whereby I need to spend money to buy clothes. We’re trying to save for a house you see and while I feel as though I can justify spending money on clothing because I have little that fits me, at the same time I always feel slightly guilty for spending on myself.

So, ladies and gentlemen, we know the upsides of losing weight but we should not forget the downsides. I suppose, though, that they aren’t so much downsides as merely small potholes on the road to a thinner you. Nonetheless they are driving me slightly crazy and I thought I’d share this craziness with you. That is one of the main purposes of this blog: to share my craziness with the general public. Enjoy it readers for I have plenty more to give.

Anyway, my finishing time was….wait for it…29 minutes 38 seconds. I finished 110th out of 115 people. I suppose for my first go it’s not so bad and at least I didn’t finish dead last. I think running on the soft ground made the biggest difference. I’m just not used to it. The highest my heart rate should be going, according to my heart rate monitor’s fitness test, is 173. It didn’t drop below 173 the whole 29 minutes, 38 seconds. During the last 100 metres or so when I was giving it all I had (of what I had left) my heart rate was 186. I was working over-time to finish that thing.

I’m proud of me and my husband is proud of me. I have a huge sense of accomplishment but also now an addiction. I want to do it again and I want to get better. Watch this space for more run results. Here are a few pictures from today.

Admittedly, yes, I am still a bit too pudgy to be seen in public in skin-tight lycra but, hey, I’m working on it, ok?!

Oh yes, it’s Krispy Kreme time. Let me tell you, those chocolate doughnuts were so damn good! Seriously, slap yo momma good. Mmm, mmm, MMMMM!

So that’s been my Saturday. Hope you enjoy the rest of yours.